I think in general I’ve always pretty much had a good handle on what’s going on in a relationship. I’ve always trusted my intuition and I’ve always known that my intuition is right. Now whether I decide to go with that or not is a different story. But I always knew, and I tell women this all the time, intuition will never lead you astray. Never. We have it for a reason. But we choose to try and turn it down or try and turn it off. And that’s something that I’ve always known but it wasn’t until I got a little older that I learned to just listen to that, because I think we all hear it. Women, we always know what’s going on. Whether we choose to act on that is a different story.
Something that my Dad always told me a long time ago…. guy is always going to show you his cards. Whether you choose to look at those cards for what they are or whether you just choose to act like you don’t’ see them, a man will always show you his cards. So don’t act surprised later when something happens, because you saw it already in the beginning and you chose not to heed that. And that is really true. So how did that change me? I didn’t hang around and try and figure a guy out a million different ways, like maybe this or maybe he was sick or maybe he just whatever. It’s like, it is what it is. We’ve got to start wasting time and energy on a situation when there’s nothing to figure out. And we tend to do that all the time. We’re so good at that.
On Love & War
It’s pretty much about the ups and downs in a relationship. Not so much the ups, but it’s more about the downs of the relationship or coming to the other side after going through trials and tribulations. It’s definitely a less idealized viewpoint of relationships — just the things that we go through to grow as individuals, being individuals and being in a relationship and what that means.
It’s pretty personal. I mean [the album is about] things that I’ve gone through, my history of past relationships. There’s also stories from lots of my friends and their issues in their relationships. I wanted each song to have a facet of a relationship. It’s not like the entire album is one relationship. It could be, but it also could be different relationships. I wanted each song to tell a specific story. So it was really important to make sure I kept that in mind when I was writing, so I didn’t go off and become too varied and lose what the story was.
On staying true to herself
I always made a decision early on that I wouldn’t try to forget who I really am, that I wouldn’t try to just lose myself in everything. I’m not into secret marriages or big relationships for press and all those things. I’m into just doing me, being me and creating my music. And that’s it. People happen to take a picture of me walking around, that’s cool. None of those things bother me. As long as I don’t lose my sense of what’s real. Whatever that means, as long as I have my own sense of me then everything can just be put into perspective.
On connecting with her fans
I always reach out to me fans. When I first came out, I had my own website and I would do an update. A lot of people weren’t doing that. Some were, but not a whole lot. It was more like posting a paragraph about what’s going on. And now with Twitter and everything, it’s just like a constant influx of information from everyone, you know? I do have a Twitter account and I definitely do use it.